How to meet needs
I think the first skill we need in becoming a lower light is learning how to listen with empathy. So often growing up I wanted to wow the room with my brilliance so I spent my time figuring out what I was going to say, that I never engaged with what another person was saying. Then I realized it wasn't about what I was going to say, it was about knowing another's need. I can't meet a need I don't know exists. Often now I find that if I just focus on what they are saying I can hear what is being left unsaid or holes that need to be filled.
We all want to feel loved and validated, we all hope that what we say matters, we hope that someone out there understands. One of the first steps for someone trying to feel love from Heavenly Father is knowing they are loved. We can help by listening without judgement or comment. There was a shooting in a synagogue in Pittsburgh, everyday more violence appears on the news...I sort of wonder if violence is increasing as our ability and desire to listen decreases. My challenge to all of you is in the next 24 to 48 hours pray for someone in your life that you can connect with by listening. By listening to what is said and what goes unsaid. Pray to have the Spirit to know what to say or not say to best fill their need.
I know when I was in a dark place and I would share what was going on the two things I heard that hurt the most was, well you are strong, you can make it and second, well it will get better. I didn't feel strong, I felt weak, that's why I was sharing. And I couldn't see it getting better so that felt of little comfort. When (and I don't say if because as President Eyring said, more than half the time the people we are talking to are going through a battle) you hear someone share their battle, hug first, thank them for sharing their struggle and then after listening for the Spirit ask them what they need. Not what you can do for them, but what they need. They will hesitate to put you on the spot or know already that you can't fill that need. But them sharing that need allows the Spirit to become active in sending them what they need through you or through another.
We all want to feel loved and validated, we all hope that what we say matters, we hope that someone out there understands. One of the first steps for someone trying to feel love from Heavenly Father is knowing they are loved. We can help by listening without judgement or comment. There was a shooting in a synagogue in Pittsburgh, everyday more violence appears on the news...I sort of wonder if violence is increasing as our ability and desire to listen decreases. My challenge to all of you is in the next 24 to 48 hours pray for someone in your life that you can connect with by listening. By listening to what is said and what goes unsaid. Pray to have the Spirit to know what to say or not say to best fill their need.
I know when I was in a dark place and I would share what was going on the two things I heard that hurt the most was, well you are strong, you can make it and second, well it will get better. I didn't feel strong, I felt weak, that's why I was sharing. And I couldn't see it getting better so that felt of little comfort. When (and I don't say if because as President Eyring said, more than half the time the people we are talking to are going through a battle) you hear someone share their battle, hug first, thank them for sharing their struggle and then after listening for the Spirit ask them what they need. Not what you can do for them, but what they need. They will hesitate to put you on the spot or know already that you can't fill that need. But them sharing that need allows the Spirit to become active in sending them what they need through you or through another.
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